I don’t remember many chapel talks at ACU. In fact, I can probably count on one hand the number of talks I can remember from my 4 years in college. One of those was by a professor named Carl Brecheen. For a long time, Brecheen led a marriage seminar with Paul Faulkner, and at this particular chapel, he was talking about his marriage. He said something I will never forget: “I have fallen in and out of love with my wife several times throughout our long marriage. But I didn’t marry into love, I married into a commitment.”
Hollywood gives us a “happily ever after” picture of love: a magical love with dramatic kisses in the rain, couples patient with their partner’s quirks and imperfections, clever banter, and effortless intimacy. But in this sense, art does not imitate reality. I have an amazing wife. We love each other and are both pursuing Christ. And yet, we have to work hard at our marriage. Everyday we have to recommit ourselves to loving each other as Christ loves the church.
Geness 24:67 says, “So she (Rebekah) became his (Isaac) wife, and he loved her.” That’s backwards right? Love is supposed to proceed marriage. But in this passage, it says they got married and Isaac loved his wife. Love is a choice. Mark Batterson wrote, “I think you should marry someone because you love them. But you should also love them because you married them. It’s both/and.” Marriage can be hard. There are tough days. But love is more than an emotional feeling. It is an active choice you make each day.
